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What Women Want in a Man

The Bottom Line on Women's Desires!

Kichen helper.Most women pay close attention to how men accumulate power and resources, and how generous they are. Woman want a mate who dedicates himself and his resources totally to insuring survival and a good life for her and her children. That is in women's DNA programming even though in the past few decades some woman are seeking careers rather than making a family.

Even though women and men may act and dress in modern acceptable ways today, they are all still strongly influenced by their ancient ancestors' desires programmed in their DNA.

Women want EMOTIONAL intimacy. (That means she is watching her mate to see how loyal and devoted he is to only her.)

Men want PHYSICAL intimacy. (Healthy young men make 200 to 300 millon sperm a day! That is a powerful drive to get intimate with a woman! Any woman!)



Most women want a monogamous relationship and long term commitment before turning on the passion hormones. This scheme is what worked best for women to make babies and survive during the past several million years. This need is even in women not consciously thinking about marrying and raising children!

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Nature has even built into women a natural means of helping her select the man who sticks around. Women are only fertile approximately 24 hours a month. The guy who is there knocking on her door regularly has the best chance of making her pregnant. Incidentally, men's sperm are pretty smart: they will lay and wait for her egg for up to 72 hours!

Men's ancient DNA strategy for producing the most offspring was to have frequent sex with as many women as possible.

One guy and two women.Men's DNA programing is for frequent sex with any willing healthy female, and with no commitments. That is what worked best for millions of men's male ancestors to pass on their DNA genes.



The men who were the strongest, smartest, and "hornest" lived another day and, if they were lucky, found a woman to have some quick sex with. It undoubtedly was not the men's plan but this sexual process, done for the fun of it, did pass on their genes to offspring. For ancient men, some sex and a full belly was about as good as it could get. (That is a pretty good day even today!)

Summary (5 of 12)

Women's DNA programmed needs, which come from millions of successful female ancestors, make women seek a man with these characteristics:

  • He has many resources to make a good safe life for her and her children.
  • He places a high priority on her and her children's safety and desires.
  • He is strong, healthy, agreeable to live with, and is willing to stick around for the long run.

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© Copyright 2008, revised 2013 by Lawrence Rodrigues, M.S., Director: EastWest Institute for Self-Understanding
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