How To Do Dating and Courting to Successfully Find a Mate
Men today usually seek a woman for a mate by dating and courting. Frequent dates lets her know that he is interested in her as a possible mate and/or a sexual partner. The mate-seeking process varies by culture and religion, and there are traditional rules for mating that may or may not be written down. That makes the task very difficult. (Some guys become hermits rather than face the overwhelming challenges in dating and courting!)
In most western cultures, courting is done in ways that demonstrates a man's best characteristics so the woman will accept him closer emotionally and physically over time. The courting man's general pattern is to request frequent dates. During this time he will appeal most positively to his selected woman so she will invite him closer emotionally and physically. This generally includes lots of touching and maybe even you-know-what.
In order for him to be accepted by her, he has to take his time and let her see his many good characteristics. The woman makes the ultimate decision to let him get closer, and maybe even let him do that really good-feeling stuff with her.
Courting Allows the Woman Time to Evaluate the Men and Select the Best One
Women are unconsciously watching for signs of how good of a protector and provider the man is. Most women want to know if the man will make a good provider mate, and will stick around to take care of her and the offspring after the initial fun is over. Most woman need reassurance that the man really likes and values her, and that he is not going to just use her for his own pleasure then abandon her. (GUYS: She is looking for you to demonstrate being stimulating, attentive, protecting, and caring in all matters. Lots of luck meeting her expectations!)
Most women unconsciously or consciously seek a man who has these characteristics:
- He listens to her and understands her needs and desires. This indicates there is a good relationship established. A good relationship means safety, security and survival, which is the primary need programed in women's ancient DNA.
- He values her and is dedicated to protecting her and her offspring. This implies a good chance for survival of her and her children.
- He has the resources and capacity to provide a safe and good life for her and her offspring. Seems like the best deal she can get for a future good life for her and her children.
Notice that these characteristics are coming mostly from the DNA of women's prehistoric ancestors who lived in very dangerous conditions. Today's women and men may talk about "love", but only in the past few hundred years have the concepts of "love" and "fidelity" become part of the process of mating. As a species we really are not very advanced in these "love" and "fidelity" concepts. They vary widely throughout the various cultures in the world and are not the real basis of mate selection for most women.
Most religions, societies, governments, and cultures have invented rules for insuring the mating process is controlled to suit the needs of those in power. This greatly complicates the mating process for many couples throughout the world!
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How the Mating Game Really Works
- Men must court women to find a mate. If a man does his courting well, he may be able to get his desired woman into a relationship that satisfies her deep needs. She makes the final decision to let him in, or not, to her life and bed.
- Women look for the best man available. Dating and courting gives a woman the opportunity and time to evaluate the men. The woman normally has the chance to select the best one who will help insure the survival of her and her offspring in the future. Women are seeking the one man who can make the best life possible for her and her offspring.
Here is the real evolution secret:
Every woman is looking for the ONE man to satisfy ALL her needs.
Every man is looking for ALL women to satisfy his ONE need!
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